Thursday, May 19, 2005

Life is a Roller Coaster

Since Easter, I've been part of a Bible in 90 Days group at work. We meet on Wednesdays during lunch to test drive the curriculum. I was struck by a comment on the video. John Walton explained that our perspective shapes our response to events. We get in trouble when we expect life to be a monorail ride. If we're expecting a monorail, we get alarmed if we take an unexpected dip or a sharp turn. If we think life is a roller coaster, on the other hand, we'd be disappointed if our ride was level. We raise our hands and thoroughly enjoy the highs, scream in delight as we come crashing down, and wait expectantly in the low points because we know that the next high point is just around the corner. I needed that reminder because life is giving me whiplash.

This week is good example. For those of you following along, you know I've been looking forward to the concert tonight (and yes, I have a friend joining me!) Work is getting better and I'm FINALLY feeling like I'm making a contribution. On the other hand, I can tell that I'm on the bubble healthwise, and I'm so afraid of another relapse. Next week I'm going to have a five day weekend so I'm just praying that I can make it until then. Yesterday, I had a bit of a scare. All week I've been feeling nauseous, dizzy, light-headed, headache-y, all the lovely friends I've bonded with since my injury. I also had a bit of sore throat. I wasn't sure if I was feeling off because I need a few days off or if I was fighting off a cold. Saturday I was cleaning my bathroom and apparently didn't have the room as well ventilated as I thought. That apparently was too much for my wussy immune system. By yesterday afternoon I was having a hard time breathing and my doc sent me to the ER. I wonder if I can get frequent visitor discounts! Because of my history they took some extra precautions, but I'm fine. Annoyed with my body, but fine. I'm breathing better today with the help of a fancy-schmancy inhaler. I'm tempted to think I'm on a low rider monorail, but I'm thinking, even though my health stuff frustrates me, it's getting easier to see the highs in my life right now...great job, great insurance, great friends (Dan and Sara rock!) who cancelled plans to take me to the ER, great neighbors to watch my dog, and the best dog in the world.

I've learned a lot about unconditional love from my dog. No matter what my mind or emotions through at me, Bailey makes me smile. So I'll end this update (and explanation of my MIA status yesterday) with her. Today was grooming day. Here's the before close up:

No comments: