A few years back a friend mentioned that she made a list of traditions and rituals she wanted to incorporate into her marriage and family if/when she married. (And she just did!) Prior to our conversations, I had thought I was the only one with that particular quirk It actually came up quite often as I interviewed other children of divorce. In the absence of continuity with our families, we crave to create our own traditions. Those I interviewed talked about file folders, binders, Word documents saved with secret names, pictures, knicknacks and facts boxed and buried...a dizzying array of ways these ideas were duly noted for future reference.
I heard a new one yesterday and thought I'd post it here. The idea is that a parent (the dad in this case) had a certain place in the house with candle for each child. Each morning for the children got up, the dad lit the candle as he prayed for that child. When we was done, he blew out the candle. When the child passed the candle area, he or she saw a tangible picture of their father's love and concern.